I will be taking poly to save my marriage

[qtpass]

This week or next, I will be taking a polygraph in order to convince my husband that I am not lying to him about my sex life.  I have made some mistakes in the past, but he doubts whether I have "fessed up" to all.

I really don't want to lose this marriage, and if I can pass this test, I believe we will be able to move forward.  I am very nervous after reading this site about whether or not I will be able to pass.

Please help me.

qt

[Mr. Truth]

Don't take it. There are bigger trust issues involved than the fraud of polygraphy can resolve for you. What if you "fail" the test? Taking the poly in a situation like this reminds me of this saying:

The best thing you can do when you find yourself in a hole is to stop digging.

[Saidme]

If you need to pass a polygraph test to convince him of your honesty, maybe you should just move on.  If this guys gone this far, I doubt seriously if you'll ever convince him.  

[Canadian Crusader]

Finally something we can agree on Saidme.

Don't take the test.  It will be a colossal  waste of money and there is the distinct possiblity he won't believe you even if you "pass" the poly.

If you can't trust each other based on your word then in my eyes you two don't have enough of a relationship worth fighting for.  Plus you have already said you made some mistakes in the past (cheated on him??) so the relationship must not be that great.  Move on.

Sorry.

[Human Subject]

If you need to pass a polygraph test to convince him of your honesty, maybe you should just move on.  If this guys gone this far, I doubt seriously if you'll ever convince him.  

I'm so puzzled that you didn't stick to your guns on this one.  Why is this an exceptional case?

[qtpass]

Sorry it has taken so long for me to come back and read your responses.  

I appreciate the advice of all of you, but where I am emotionally is in a place that I am not ready to say goodbye to the relationship.  We have not yet done the test, but we will be and I have decided to take it.  I have read the book on this site, and think that I may be able to feel confident about passing.  If I pass we will be able to move forward with a clean slate and try to salvage what we have.

I have made mistakes and he is willing to forgive, but this polygraph is a final reassurance for him.

If anyone has any other advice, I would be so grateful.

[Human Subject]

What if he finds out you read about polygraphy?

This just sounds like a very sad situation, and to be honest it doesn't bode well for the future of this relationship.  Hate to have to say it.

You should sever the relationship solely due to the fact that this guy puts any stock in polygraphy.

[Mr. Truth]

Know when to hold 'em or fold 'em.
Know when to fish or cut bait.
Know when to cowboy up or go sit in the truck.

Good luck with the "test," but, and I am confident even Prudie would agree with me, you can stick a fork in this relationship because it is done. This issue will never go away for your significant other. If you fail, but went in telling the truth, you lose. If you pass, there is always that element of doubt, so you don't win.

[septic_tank]

Here's an idea: stop cheating on your husband.  

Hopefully he'll wisen up and file for divorce before you make any more "mistakes"....DUH.

[Robert]

Qtpass hey don't listen to that crap. Saving your marriage is important so give it all you can. Unfortunately the polygraph is not reliable enough to prove you are telling the truth. I encourage you to be honest with your husband and share the information you have learned about the polygraph with Him so he will know about its lack of validity. You and your Husband could benifit greatly from a good qualified marriage counselor. I wish you all the best.

Best regards Robert