My boyfriend and I have been on and off for three years.
We were young and not 100% committed during the first year and a half. We broke up for 6 months, tried to find ourselves and ran off to Seattle together. 
No distractions. Just eachother. But the past came up to haunt us... He constantly thought I was cheating. Accused me of the craziest things and literally looked for reasons to believe I was cheating. 
We went on a 4day meth binge, and his paranoia kicked in. (Yeah bad idea. I'm clean now) 
It was 4 days of him convincing himself how I cheated, with who and when. 
Anyway, after a nigt of sleep he was still convinced? So I begged him to let me take a polygraph. Because I LOVE this man and made a promise to not fuxk things up again. Not to mention, I worked all the time.... 

Anyway, so I paid the 275 bucks to take an infidelity polygraph and I freaking failed? I don't know why or how. His baseline questions were odd and weren't black or white and had a lot to do with my past. I don't understand how I failed it. Maybe the meth? The 4 days of fighting about it? 
Needless to say the love of my life broke up with me .
Unless I admit and tell him how and with how many.
I refuse to make up a story about how I cheated just to win him back. I was 100% faithful and that polygraph ruined my life. I wouldn't have begged for or even paid for a test that I thought I was going to fail. 

Has anyone else ever had a similar situation? 
I want to take another one just to clear my name with him... But I'm genuinely afraid of the same outcome. 
Please help.