Hi,

I met a person for the first time after I returned to my birth country.  I fell deeply in love with this person, even though I was in denial that I was in love with this person.  It wasn't until a year later that I re-visited this person and found out she had the same feelings for me.

Long story short, I am now married with this person.  My parents do not know about it, nor do her parents, the reason being I am related to this person, we are cousins.   

I've been preparing myself to be a law enforcement officer, and I honestly can not imagine myself in another profession anymore.   I will soon be graduating with a business degree and have began the process to apply, and my number one department to apply to asks, "Have you had any sexual contact with any relative?"

The answer to that is obvious, but I do not want this to be a determining factor in anything.  I have a squeaky clean background, I'm not some freak, I don't have any psychological issues I'm a normal man who had a normal life.  I've been extremely successful at the top level in the world in a sport I've participated in (I will not mention to not reveal my identity), what I'm trying to say is I'm not insane.

Do you think this could be a determining factor?

Generator wrote on Jun 6^th, 2008 at 3:20am:


Answer in the affirmative;  Yes, my wife... (Which is the truth, of course, and so the little poly gremlins that hide in the recesses of your brain won't rat you out).  BTW, I doubt if that question will even be on the poly, it sounds like a question from the background package.

Good luck.

I thank you all for your replies, of course I will be honest, that is why I am concerned.   

The number one department I want to apply for has a question on the pre-employment polygraph packet, "Have you ever had any sexual contact with any relatives?"

Now, the answer to that is obvious, I do not need to go further into details.  However, I'm not some sicko guy.  I met her for the first time when I was 18 (she was 19).  We were both in denial with ourselves that we were in love until I visited her again a year later.  Our families don't know about it, yet.

I pulled up the legislative family statutes of the country in which we were married in.  It is NOT illegal, it is not a crime committed if two first cousins marry, however, if found out, it will be considered invalid UNLESS the court decides to consider it valid (they can bend the law how they want) or the wife is pregnant or a family is already created.

So the way I interpreted the law (reading it in the native language) and in the translated version, there is no crime committed or any punishment.

The only thing I could be facing is the background investigator assuming I am psychologically not fit.

Upon a lot of research, I found out that it is actually normal for relatives to reunite or meet for the first time and fall in love.

Quote:



We are both Armenian, I was two years old moving to the states.  It is not a common practice or even socially accepted in Armenia.

However, we are both two consenting adults, we did not break any laws.

My concern is whether there is a possibility that could be taken into consideration in any discriminatory way.  It is not something we tell people, we keep it private.  The only people that know are my very close friends.  It is something that is actually insignificant for us as we did not even see or even ever speak with each another until we were adults.

If at all, this has honestly made me a stronger individual.  I had wanted to be a police officer for a long time, but it was sort of a "taboo" subject in my home, but after this I have realized that I live my life for myself (and now also my wife) and I will do in my life what will make us happy, not do what my parents want.

I just turned 20, so I am kind of young, and although age is usually a good indicator of maturity, it is not an absolute indicator.  My marriage with her was not in a "run off and do one of those immature marriages" thing.

I will be graduating in about two years and I hope this doesn't cause a problem, if it seems like it will, I think I will just have to apply to a department which doesn't ask the question.