Becoming Paranoid....

[local pd poly]

I will be taking a pre-employment poly for a local PD in the next 2 weeks.  I am becoming increasingly paranoid about it.  I have a couple of questions that I do not have a solid answer on.  I simply do not remember EXACTLY how many times I used marajuana as it was about 6 years ago.  I really, really want to get a job with this department and I am becoming totally paranoid about taking this test.  To the point where just thinking about it makes me nervous.  I have been honest with all of my answers to the best of my ability up to this point with the background officer, but I have nagging doubts in the far back of my mind.  How worried do I need to be?

[OkieBoy]

Dear localpigpoly,
Just be honest.  Tell them you don't know exactly how much you smoked all that weed.
Hey...if you ever make a big weed bust could you sell me some for real cheap?

[George W. Maschke]

local pd poly,

In some cases, a polygrapher may draw adverse inferences if an applicant claims not to be able to remember exactly how many times he/she smoked marijuana, perhaps especially if the department has a strict cut-off on the number of times permissable for applicants, as does the FBI.

It might be in your best interest to estimate the number of times you used marijuana and state that that is the number of times you used it, but that is a judgment call that you will have to make for yourself.

In any event, it would behoove you to educate yourself about polygraphy before your examination. See The Lie Behind the Lie Detector to learn more about the junk science on which polygraph "testing" is actually based, as well as suggestions on how to protect yourself against the risk of a false positive outcome.

[local_pd_poly]

George, I have been reading and it's pretty good so far.  Basically, I want to make a spike on the control questions so that any other question I may possibly be unsure of will look minor compared to the blip made by a "pucker," correct?  I've been very honest and I'm really hoping on getting this job.  By the way, Okie, I have not smoked that much weed and I have not done any in years.

[George W. Maschke]

The key to passing is to show greater reactions to the "control" questions than to the relevant questions (whether or not you're sure of your answers to any of them). Note also that the anal sphincter contraction is only one of several countermeasure strategies available.

[Doodad]

As I read through these various pages I can't help but feel that George and his various like minded posters are doing a tremendous service to society by showing that we should not rely on something that doesn't work. Counter  measures in my mind are akin to the kind of non violent civil disobedience often necessary to make a democracy work.

[beech trees]

As I read through these various pages I can't help but feel that George and his various like minded posters are doing a tremendous service to society by showing that we should not rely on something that doesn't work. Counter  measures in my mind are akin to the kind of non violent civil disobedience often necessary to make a democracy work.

Indeed. To quote one of the great thinkers, Henry David Thoreau:

They think that, if they should resist, the remedy would be worse than the evil. But it is the fault of the government itself that the remedy is worse than the evil. It makes it worse.