Hello everyone,

Firstly, I would like to commend the creator of this website for his excellent content and his commitment to educating people about the unethical and inaccurate garbage science that is polygraphy.

Secondly, a personal message to Quickfix; you are a piece of trash human being and I wish the most horrible fate imaginable upon you.

Okay, let me give everyone a little background on myself and my situation.  I am a male between the age of 25 and 30 years old.  I live in Virginia.  I have a Bachelors of Business Administration as well as a Juris Doctorate (law degree).  I have work experience in finance.  I have a spotless criminal record and background.  I have a very good credit history.

I am in the middle of my application process with a certain Federal Agency or State/Local Law Enforcement Agency, I don't like going into specifics that could in anyway help a BI or polygraph examiner identify me (paranoid I know).

I have a very clean background and I am going to be completely truthful on my polygraph.  But, as we all know, polygraphs are garbage and can and will fail 50%+ of truthful applicants.  This is unacceptable to me.  I have massive student debt, quit my finance job because I was miserable and can now not even get an interview for $10 an hour Bank Teller jobs, let alone anything close to the $80,000 a year I was making previously.  If I do not pass this polygraph and get this job I will likely end up homeless and default on my student loans.  My life will essentially be over.  I know if I pass the polygraph I will get the job, I am extremely overqualified and have a speaky clean background.  So essentially this make believe tarrot card test is going to decide whether my life continues normally or I become homeless.  Wonderful, I know.

Now for my questions.  I appreciate all responses, except Quickfix, and thank everyone in advance.  I have read this site extensively including the entire The lie behind the lie detector.  I just want to clarify a few things as well as see if anyone can add anything else useful.

My plan is thus; right when a question is asked, identify it as either a control question or a relevant question.  If it is a control question, exhale and do not inhale for the next breathe for 3-4 seconds. (at all other times during the test I will focus on breathing consistently).  Also when i identify the question as control, think of stepping on a snake, getting attacked by a shark, whatever else increases my heart rate and makes me anxious/nervous.  I have a question regarding this; is it better to do mental arithmetic?  I have tried that and it does not seem to increase my heart rate, is that not a necessary symptom for mental arithmetic to be effective?  I ask because sometimes I can think of things mentally that increase my heart rate, but it does not always work.  Sometimes I will think of a snake biting me and I get no physiological response that I can notice.  This worries me.  So I guess a more general way to ask this question would be:  what mental countermeasure is most effective and works consistently?  Does mental arithmetic actually increase heart rate or is that not the goal of doing that?

Next question.  On control questions like "Have you ever stolen anything?"  I understand that most people have done this and that the examiner also knows that most people have stolen something at some point.  Are you suppose to tell the truth and say yes, while doing countermeasures?  Or are you suppose to lie and say no, while doing countermeasures?

Sorry for the long post, but this is extremely important to my life and well being in a big picture, very serious type of way.

When I do take my polygraph I will for sure post a very detailed post about it and will also update it to include if I passed or failed.

Thank you everyone, and never stop educating people about how archaic, inaccurate, unethical and damaging polygraphs are.

Hello1977 wrote on Aug 30^th, 2016 at 5:15pm:


There is no research on the relative effectiveness of different kinds of mental polygraph countermeasures.

On the cardio tracing, polygraph operators look for changes in baseline, which is not directly a function of heart rate. See p 33 ff. of Test Data Analysis: DoDPI Numerical Evaluation Scoring System.

Quote:


One should give the expected answer to the "control" question, which in this case is "no."

Hello1977 wrote on Aug 31^st, 2016 at 2:45am:


Also, as I've expounded on this forum ad nauseum, a possibly even more formidable obstacle than the polygraph to your successfully securing a sinecure in those buildings just off of Dolly Madison's highway will be the lifestyle aspect of the background investigation.

Hello1977 wrote on Aug 31^st, 2016 at 2:14pm:


I'll be most interested in learning more of your experiences as you wend the torturous path! 

One more critical point for you:

If you are desperate for work, do NOT put all your eggs in one basket, with respect to employment in the intelligence community (if that is where you are in fact seeking employment)

The statistical odds against ultimately being hired are grossly stacked against you, and the application process can drag on for months.

The most frustrating aspect about employment at the so-called "three-letter" agencies is learning that whatever qualifications you may enjoy and enthusiasm for finding work there all count for zilch.  The primary concern is how much dirt that can or can't be found in your background.

Another "fringe benefit" of working in the intelligence community is that many of your co-workers will display personality quirks similar to those of a "quickfix" !

Just out of curiosity, can't you find any work with a JD  in VA?

Hello1977 wrote on Sep 1^st, 2016 at 3:54pm:


Don't worry, asshole, when you fail your first polygraph, you won't be invited back for a second one, so you better ask for that coffee on day one.

ROTFLMAO!

A most predictable display of federal polygraph operator hubris.

Quickifix, while you're at it, please make mine with cream and two sugars.

What a schmuck... Quickfix took the bait like a novice.

Classic. 

Hello1977 wrote on Sep 2^nd, 2016 at 2:48am:


Dear Hello1977 -   You beat me too it !  I was going to post that it was too bad that Quickfix wasn't born in Germany in the 1920's - He would have made an excellent concentration camp guard !   Let's hope that he and all other federal polygraph operators share the same fate as the Nazi concentration camp guards.  (I am saying being put on trial, not advocating violence) 
Actually they are more of the ilk of the concentration camp commandants.  More innocent blood on their hands.