AntiPolygraph.org Message Board

Polygraph and CVSA Forums => The Lie Behind the Lie Detector => Topic started by: polyh8r on Aug 16, 2008, 02:07 PM

Title: Seat Sensor
Post by: polyh8r on Aug 16, 2008, 02:07 PM
How dodes one tell if thr poly has a seat sensor, are there wires?
If no sensor, how effective is the anal sphincter contraction?
Title: Re: Seat Sensor
Post by: T.M. Cullen on Aug 16, 2008, 03:30 PM
No wires. They have extremely sensitive anal sensors embedded in the seat cushion.  Even the slightest movement is detected then relayed via satellite telemetry to APA hqs for instantaneous analysis.  Polygraphic telemetry experts there are paid hazardous duty pay there, reportedly, because of the frequent farting by test subjects.

So don't even think of puckering that filthy little anus of yours, pervert!

This is serious national security business!  

And it's their job, DAMN IT!  :D

TC
Title: Re: Seat Sensor
Post by: polytek on Aug 18, 2008, 08:52 AM
Quote from: polyh8r on Aug 16, 2008, 02:07 PMHow dodes one tell if thr poly has a seat sensor, are there wires?
If no sensor, how effective is the anal sphincter contraction?

It's quite hard NOT to notice the piezo cushion.
Looks like a flexible pc board in cellophane or like
a flexible solar collector (PV) panel.
There will be a wire leading from where you place yr ass
to the polygraph. Fart hard and often. It will shrink and die.
Title: Re: Seat Sensor
Post by: Joe McCarthy on Aug 22, 2008, 07:35 PM
Quote from: polyh8r on Aug 16, 2008, 03:30 PMNo wires. They have extremely sensitive anal sensors embedded in the seat cushion.  Even the slightest movement is detected then relayed via satellite telemetry to APA hqs for instantaneous analysis.  Polygraphic telemetry experts there are paid hazardous duty pay there, reportedly, because of the frequent farting by test subjects.

So don't even think of puckering that filthy little anus of yours, pervert!

This is serious national security business!  

And it's their job, DAMN IT!  :D

TC

Actually the Polygraphic Telemetry Anal Headquarters is located in Dallas Texas, and it's not their job, it's their pleasure.

Title: Re: Seat Sensor
Post by: tiedoverbarrel on Nov 03, 2008, 12:46 PM
You guys are seriously twisted! I'm gonna like it here.   :)