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Topic summary

Posted by xenonman
 - Jul 08, 2014, 04:55 PM
QuoteThis is the funniest thing I have ever read.....lol ;D


That's what I should have done during ;D my polygraph "interview" in langley 35 years ago!! :D
Posted by xenonman
 - May 06, 2014, 12:15 AM
QuoteI took a poly the other day and I had gas.  I couldn't hold it in but I kept farting throughout the polygraph session (loud smelly ones too).  The polygrapher accused me of using my farts as a countermeasure and warned me to stop, but I couldn't.  Though the smell was asphyxiating, the seat sensor recorded every time I pooted and it pissed off the polygrapher as he started to interrogate me.  "I know what you are doing, stop farting!  I know you are hiding something and you better tell me what it is.  I don't waste time with people who try to beat the machine".  This sucks, I was yelled at and interrogated for hours and accused of using countermeasures all because of a little gas.  Do you think I failed the poly?  I haven't heard anything back yet.  Can having gas cause you to fail?


I just LOVE it! :D
Posted by Me2013
 - Feb 22, 2014, 01:55 PM
This is the funniest thing I have ever read.....lol ;D
Posted by Guest
 - Jan 08, 2012, 09:03 PM
This story was a bunch of BS...I can't believe people actually fell for it.
Posted by Aunty Agony
 - Dec 28, 2011, 02:07 PM
I interrogated dozens of detainees in that Vietnam business, using a variety of stress techniques.  We never learned anything from these sessions.  They learned how to stonewall us, and just endured our threats in stony silence.

I think if they had started farting at us, the war would have taken an entirely different course.

-Aunty Agony.
Posted by Bill_Brown
 - Dec 23, 2011, 06:30 PM
POOT,

This is the funniest story I have read in a long time.  I'm sure it is not funny to you, however it will be in my book!  I cannot recall this ever happening or being reported by an examiner at a seminar. 

The examiner should have stopped the exam and rescheduled you for a time when you did not have a "gas" problem.
Posted by Twoblock
 - Dec 23, 2011, 04:47 PM
POOT

Your didn't pass. His nose that is. You should have told him "if I try to squeeze it off your little machine would certainly show countermeasures". This is the best one yet. LMAO.
Posted by POOT
 - Dec 23, 2011, 03:57 PM
I took a poly the other day and I had gas.  I couldn't hold it in but I kept farting throughout the polygraph session (loud smelly ones too).  The polygrapher accused me of using my farts as a countermeasure and warned me to stop, but I couldn't.  Though the smell was asphyxiating, the seat sensor recorded every time I pooted and it pissed off the polygrapher as he started to interrogate me.  "I know what you are doing, stop farting!  I know you are hiding something and you better tell me what it is.  I don't waste time with people who try to beat the machine".  This sucks, I was yelled at and interrogated for hours and accused of using countermeasures all because of a little gas.  Do you think I failed the poly?  I haven't heard anything back yet.  Can having gas cause you to fail?