Went in today for my polygraph. I was relatively calm and relaxed, which was a miracle, given how I've been stressing about this a very long time. 

Got in there, and it was exactly like what I've been reading about. Them giving their false explanations and setting you up for anxiety and fear. And somehow, when the test started, I lost my cool. I was so anxious, I was literally seeing white closing in on my vision. 

After that, it was all downhill. I didn't have the presence of mind to make note of the control questions nor to act on them in time when I heard them. Then in the end, I ended up passing with flying colors the questions I was worried about, while failing a question I wasn't the least bit concerned about. 

Now I'm going to have to take another polygraph and I'm hoping for tips on how to control this fear. My current plan, if I can do it, is to practice private polygraphs to get used to the whole stupid thing. Desensitize myself so I don't melt down again. 

I'm also wondering if anyone has the link for Doug Williams video that went along with his book. We paid the fifty bucks for it, and five minutes later, learned he was dead. And now can't get into our protonmail account to see if we were sent anything. Didn't do a recovery due to my paranoia.

That's my sad story for this time. Hopefully, the next will be happier.