I believe some levity is in order.

I am in a 20 year relationship with a man I suspect is cheating on me.  We have a lot invested in this relationship, and I don't want it to end.  But I just have to get to the bottom of this.  I have no evidence to prove or disprove my suspicions but a gypsy fortune teller alluded to the possibility a few weeks ago.

Should I make him take a polygraph?  I heard the test is 98% accurate.  That's what they said on the "Dr. Phil Show", though nothing has been mentioned about the polygraph on "Jerry Springer" as of yet.  Also, the polygraph is mentioned on many TV "COP" shows, so there must be something to it.

This is KILLING ME!  Like I said, I really need to know if he is cheating if I am to continue this long relationship, or end up spending the rest of my life as a bitter old TV frau with a dozen cats to feed!  Is the polygraph the answer?  It's gonna cost me $500, which is a lot more than that gypsy woman charged me, but I MUST KNOW THE TRUTH!

Please help!